Sunday, September 7, 2014

Woe is Me- the new title to every blog post from here on out.

I just need to write. You know when you are crying and you can barely see the keyboard through the tears? Well that is where I am at right now and I am thankful I know where the keys are. 

I haven't had a good night's sleep in weeks. In the last two days, I have slept five hours collectively and I am on my way to another sleepless night. I can't get comfortable; I can't turn my mind off. I tried a sleep aid but it made me restless and achey, which seems counteractive. 

What should I be [*silently, "When I grow up"]? Well, I want to do what I love- duh. Okay, so what is that? See, the problem is that I love so many things. Unrelated things. Is there a way to do 50 kajillion things at once and be like scuber duber successful, because I want to do that. I want to be the jack of all trades and the expert of none. I want that life. Where am I going? Who am I? 

You know what is worse than that though? How small my problems really are. I know (at least I sincerely hope) that one day I will look back on this time and laugh and think how lucky I was to have the freedom to choose and to have all of the world's possibilities at my feet. I look on my Facebook page and see people my age dying, raising children, facing cancer. What happened to simpler times? Do you remember when brownie mix came in a bag and there was only one kind? I was at the store today and there were over 30 boxes and I just exasperatedly shouted for a bag of brownie mix- plain and simple. The old lady walking by looked at me like I was one with her and I am beginning to feel like I am. What have I become? Why must the world harden people? I am perfectly gullible and the world won't even let me play the fool. It AIN'T right, people. 

I missed my nephews birthday after thinking about it a least four times this week. Like really Jane? He is 8. He remembers that you forgot, you piece of shit.

The thing is, I am good at getting things done. The problem is that I don't have any project that seems completable. I keep approaching it like any problem- I try one thing and if that doesn't work I try something new. The issue with this technique is that I have no focus. *Queue Christian saying, "I told you so. You need to focus on one thing, Jane." I try to peg a career path and focus on that. After 25 returned applications and remnants of crushed dreams on the floor, I try a new career paths in hopes that my luck will pick up. Each time I get more hopeful and more devoted. Each time I get more upset with myself: because I am failing, because I can't find a path, because I am not where I want to be, because I can't back myself up, because I didn't do the right things, because I didn't take that opportunity, because yadda yadda yadda. 

My day is a list of menial tasks that will never be finished. 

  • Find what makes you happy
  • Get a job
  • Pay your loans
  • Take a creative writing class
  • Learn German
  • Have fun
  • Do something cool
  • Make friggin' friends
  • Make memories
  • Unpack
  • Apply to more jobs
  • Change your approach
  • Watch 5+ episodes of The Office
  • Think of other shit you could be doing
  • Talk to your friends back home on the phone for a collective 3 hours a day
  • Listen to people lecture you on what you could be doing
  • Make connections with people who could get you a job you will be miserable doing
  • Try to decide between working for the man or working for yourself
  • Is being happy even important at this point
  • Focus on not getting stuck
  • Decide to run again
  • Think better of it this time and get a job there first
  • Figure out where your next destination is
  • Contemplate how much of a failure you will look like if you go back to Birmingham
  • Make another, more achievable list
  • Fight sleep
  • Pet the dog and cry into his fur
  • Brush the dog
  • Read more books
  • Pay attention to the news
  • Try to make yourself more you
  • Think about how much you want to blog
  • Never do it
  • Open 32 tabs in Safari and don't read any of them for at least a week
  • Continue opening more tabs
  • List all the things you need to accomplish
  • Remember to get your prescriptions filled
  • Think better of it because that money is more useful elsewhere
  • Be super hardheaded
  • Wonder how other people are getting this life shit right
  • Be sort of angry about it
  • Be actually happy for them
  • Imagine yourself successful in 20 years
  • Try to be useful
  • At least feel like you are useful
  • Remember when you were really good at shit and people probably thought you were going somewhere
  • List all of the things you could do or buy if you had money
  • Wonder how much of your life you are wasting doing these things
  • Think about wrinkles
  • Say "Fatty Fatty Boombalatty" over and over in your head and wonder where you heard it last
  • Surf Tinder
  • Realize that everyone here wears cargo shorts and earrings
  • Cry inside
  • Think about how wonderful it would be to have your own place
  • Realize you need money for that
  • See: train of thought nine bullets up
  • Make excuses
I want you to know that I wrote this list before finishing a single one of the paragraphs above. Do you see what I mean about focus? I think of nine things at once and cannot finish a single thought before another persistent little bugger is working its way out. 

I am throwing a pity party for myself. After all, since I have no friends to party with, it is all I have in the way of entertainment. You are all invited.

You know what? When I was a freshman in high school, I went out for the school play- Our Town. I happened to be (distant at the time) family friends with the Drama teacher. I ended up getting a part and I proudly walked into my house and proclaimed to my mother, "IT IS NOT ABOUT WHAT YOU KNOW, IT IS ABOUT WHO YOU KNOW!" When I tell you that this statement is biting me in the butt right now, you have no idea how hard. Not only do I not know anything, I also have the great joy of not knowing anybody either. So in this case, I am screwed. It feels like nothing will be able to get me ahead. Shit. Isn't it sort of fun to look back on moments like that and realize how stupid you were? I am sure these are the days your parents dream about. 

My head feels clearer now. I am no closer to an answer than I was when I began; however, the tears have subsided and I feel refreshed. This refreshment doesn't help with the desire for sleep though. You take what you can get, am I right? 

No comments:

Post a Comment